break free from disordered eating, addiction, or destructive cycles — and step into lasting clarity.
Niacinamide is a specific form of vitamin B3 that has shown to address many of the issues addicts need to rebalance post addiction - and a key nutrient for alcohol addiction recovery. It specifically targets liver damage, blood sugar, brain health, rapid aging, aggressiveness, anxiety and sleep. So how much should you take? And how does it work at a biochemical level exactly?
Read MoreAfter en addiction it's safe to say, that we have experienced a traumatic level of stress - psychologically as well as physically. The thing is, that just because we no longer expose ourselves to the original stressors, we often get caught in the negative stress-response feedback loop which is the underlying biochemical cause of what we call "Chronic stress". When we get caught in this negative feedback loop, we continually pump cortisol into our system. So how do we break the loop?
Read MoreI was doing an eating disorder group workshop last week and this question was asked. What do most of us do when we feel disconnected? Some of us obsess over our iphone, others have randomn sex, some of us eat too much, drink too much, take too many drugs while others constantly instagram their ABS while living in the gym addicted to social media and being "liked" for their outside, all the while they feel hollow and unloved on the inside. And yet others simply stop eating to numb the emotional pain, in attempt to feel in control in a world that feels chaotic and scattered oftentimes. So how do we reconnect when we feel disconnected and we just want to distract from the unease of being human - of feeling uncomfortable emotions?
Read MoreWhen we break things, we do so only when we replace them with other things. The key to this is to understand WHAT to replace unwanted behaviors with, otherwise it becomes a willpower struggle that will not last in the long run. Humans do not run on willpower very long - it is just not sustainable.
Read MoreIn this TED talk, poet Shane Koyczan talks about the perception of beauty. It is hauntingly, heartbreakingly beautiful. The essence being, how we need to understand that our words... the way we speak.... is what sets off every other domino effect in the world... in our own and other people's lives. Our choice of words has lasting impact on our own sense of self and those that cross pur path. Yet, we often find ourselves using words so carelessly... as if it's only words. Only words.
Read MoreOur gut is the primary driver of optimal health. This is where nutrient breakdown and assimilation happens. We know that we are not what we eat, rather what we absorb. Eating "healthy" means nothing if our gut is damaged. Alcohol, drugs and too much sugar, coffee and chemicals incl. gmo and pesticide-laden foods will sooner or later compromise our gut health, leading to a variety of symptoms. Surface symptoms that we may not link back to our gut, as the primary driver behind the dysfunction we are dealing with.
Read MoreAfter breaking the chains of addictions, we often find ourselves seeking out other ways to "cleanse" our body+soul from our destructive past. We long for the simple, perfect life. We want to start over. Whether we want to admit it or not - the pull of the quick-fix and rigid way of living in a detox, taps right into or black-white addictive thinking pattern. On the flip-side, one could argue for that it resets our body, and breaks the junkfood addiction that many of us also struggle with. So what to do?
Read MoreOur body makes our trauma real, it provides experiential knowledge of the trauma. Our cells remember hurt from the past. The emotional pain resides in our body memory.
This is why we got to listen to our body, if we want to break free of past pain.
So the key to break the cycle is to start being present in our body, and listening to our truth. Where we are right now.
By recognizing our dysfunction we can take ownership and change.
As much as it is frustrating, and pretty painful actually, to have to realize how we have been suppressing our truth; fact is that the faster we decide to examine our patterns - we can let go of that which is not serving us.
Only then can we let go and move beyond our current self-limiting beliefs, which has body memory.
Yes, we cannot just rely on talking our way out of our dysfunction. Pain and trauma has body memory. This is also why attraction happens beyond words spoken. We pick up on people's truth and core self by their body language. Our body behavior will reflect our thought patterns: are we reserved, scared of comitting? Are we open, vulnerable and caring?
The physical accent of touching is very primal because it literally transmits energy and information beyond our conscious control. Physical touch is a core part of recovery and re-connecting both with ourself and others.
Often intellectualizing things only further disconnects us and provides as a procrastination to take action.
When we touch other people (not grope them, mind you), we are showing a sense of genuine concern.
The more senses we activate in other people, the stronger the bond will be. And the more genuine also, because we are reading different levels of each others' truth. Who we really are - what we say being secondary.
We end up with an overemphasis on conscious controlled cognitive thought processing with little consideration of actual interpersonal dynamics in real time.
Where there is no relationship between what we say and what we do.
A key reason to why many of us fail to understand that we cannot keep faking it; people pick up on the unsaid cues too and react in a instinctive way to that, far more important than the picture being presented. Why glitter images of perfect lives often crumble: if too much effort is put on presenting shell perfection without attention to that which is core, we develop a gap between who we are and what we put on display for everyone to judge. When the gap is too big, we feel like frauds and we don't know where to take action because we get too attached to picture perection. And again, the lowest standard will always be perfection, because that is simply not attainable. Also, why perfectionism is so off-putting to others.
We are not being consistent and acting with integrity. We are not behaving in a way that is authentic. We are not relatable.
Words are cheap, and that is why we need to SHOW our truth not say it.
This means we are only working on our shell. Like we prefer - because core work can seem like a lot of work initially. Changing your core will hurt. It will be tiring. It will be a non-linear process of ups and downs and relapses.
That is the only way to transform your life in a way that is in alignment with who you want to be.
Whenever another storm hits, our card house will collapse. Once again.
1. CONNECTION: Create opportunities for connection to the body in a safe manner. Connection to and acceptance of all parts/ emotional states, connection to sense of Self.
2. EXPRESSION: Create opportunities for safe and healthy expression through the body,
3. COGNITION: Correct cognitive distortions related to the body.
4. FUNCTION: Create increased ability to utilize self soothing and affect regulation skills
5. MINDFULNESS: Increased ability to be present in the hear and now.
Now these 5 essential steps to gain body sensation needs to be translated into action steps that are doable for your life on a daily basis RIGHT NOW.
I want you to write down next to each step what that action step would be for you.
Sometimes we need to start from scratch. Rather than overanalyze and try to fix things that are broken and lacking; simply toss out all our bad habits, past baggage and with it our belief-system. This, in order to take action steps to create the person, we want to be in the now. It is essential to understand, that this is a decision we make ourselves. Whether we make it or not; we are completely 100% in charge of letting go of the past, in order to become the person we want to be - body, mind and soul.
Read MoreEssential oils are becoming ever more popular to treat ailments a-z. This, because we are beginning to realize, that there is no man-made synthetic medicine to which there is not already a God-made plant medicine. We just need to understand how to utilize it, rather than focus more energy on developing things based on wanting to patent side-effect laden synthetic stuff, just to get money out of it. We should be focusing on what gets results. Now, it is important to match symptom with the essential oils we use, as they are potent; affecting both our mental and physical body. It has been shown, that certain oils stimulate sympathetic nervous system activity, whereas others calm it.
Read MoreContrary to our initial reaction to this simplistic question, many of us do not stop eating because we are satisfied. Think about it. Why did you just stop eating your last meal? Is this a reason that repeats itself? What does this mean about you and your ability to listen to your body's signals?
Read MoreMost people who have struggled with an addiction or disordered eating behavior, will tell the same tale of triggering events - when everything gets overwhelming, when everything seems like there is no purpose, when there is too much stimuli or not enough.... then they go back to their drug of choice. This is due to an inability to focus on what matters at the core. When we do not know what to focus on - how to consciously shape our focus, so that is where our energy flows, we lose grasp - we slip. Retraining our brain to focus only on the select essential, that is in alignment with our purpose and passion, requires us to first be able to be in the present moment fully. Focus is the essence of any and all lasting change.
Read MoreBeing touched and cared for as an infant is paramount for our later development of self, and the establishment of our psychological self along with our physical self. Many of us today struggle with a sense of being truly comfortable in our body. And that's a real shame. Our relationship with our body will affect any other relationship we are in to some degree. If we are not comfortable with the body we are in, it gets very difficult to share our authentic self in an intimate relationship.
Read MoreYour first ritual that you do during the day is the highest leveraged ritual by far, because it has the effect of setting your mind, and setting the content, for the rest of your day. - Eben Pagan
How we wake up sets the frame for the rest of the day. Every high-achiever - and that is what breaking an addiction essentially is: a high-level achievement - has a set morning ritual. A ritual that triggers clarity, motivation, purpose and determination... that taps into the essence of who we want to be. Every. single. day.
Read MoreFeeling on edge? Here have a Xanax, why don't you. Can't sleep cause you spent too much time on the laptop? Pop a Klonopin - go ahead, it will knock you right out. Xanax and klonopin belong to the group of drugs called "Benzos". Benzos are still the top selling drugs. Unfortunately they are incredibly addictive. In fact, research has shown they are just as addictive as hard drugs like cocaine. In addition they disrupt gut health and damage the lining causing leaky gut.
Read MoreWe get so worried about being pretty. Let's be pretty KIND. Pretty FUNNY. Pretty SMART. Pretty STRONG. When we suppress our freedom of being due to external ideals, we sell ourselves short, in addition to sending off a message to others, that love is conditional. An illusion that somehow love is dependent on our physique, that we as humans need to look a certain way to earn love - to be lovable. There is nothing less attractive - and unfortunately also difficult to love ironically - than those of us, who try and try and try to fit in to be loved. The vibration of desperation is something we pick up unconsciously - why we are drawn to some people and repelled by others. Bikini season is the most obvious season to pick up on how body obsessed we have become.
Read MoreDo you know what you are trying to fit into? Everyday we make choices and trade-offs based on what we want to fit into - or not - jeans size aside. Whenever we feel lost, disconnected and lonely, it can be traced back to a lack of congruency between our values and actions. When our actions are a reflection of external pressure points; that we simply react based on trying to fit in to a shell-focused society, then we sell our soul. This makes us feel hollow. Never good enough. We fell fake.
Read MoreSize is not a reflection of health, only our vanity obsession. Thus each one of us is responsible for asking whether our lifestyle is centered around vanity and disconnectedness, rather than wholeness, happiness and acceptance... savoring the flavors of life vs. depriving ourselves. Deprivation always leads to soul hunger and most of us will binge later to compensate anyway. Or just grow emotionally unstable as we suppress our true needs. Living a life that is centered on nourishment and acceptance is health - in whatever shape, form or size that may be.
Read MoreEvery addiction, every act we do that inflicts self-hate and suffering is a desperate cry for love at the bottom of all the dysfunction. Addiction is love hunger. A hunger to be accepted for what we are at our very core. Every tale of addiction and self-destruction tells the same story of trying to fit in. Sacrificing who we are at our core: hoping to be worthy of love in some shape or form. When we don't express our needs, we stay stuck, disconnected and stagnant in our addiction.
Read MoreTrauma is a fact of life. What differs is how we cope with trauma. Trauma doesn't have to be our destiny. Most of us find it very difficult to separate what happens to us from what we are. We often base our belief system and worth around factors that happen to us. This makes us very vulnerable in this skin we are in. We are not our trauma. Only when we realize that, can we move past it. Only when we let go and decide to rewrite our story every new day, will we move past our past. The key to master our destiny is......
Read More